A New Direction

Cats in a Christmas tree. Its cute but so frustrating. You spend hours decorating the tree, making it look beautiful and perfect, then the cats get in it and pretty much destroy all your hard work. They love to climb up the middle of the tree, knocking things off as they go deeper and higher. There is no point trying to keep them out, they will find a way to do what they want to do. I was sitting here this morning looking at my once pretty tree that has now been consumed by my cats, and it came to me that its a great symbolism of our lives. We dress ourselves up, make ourselves look pretty on the outside, but then sin comes in and destroys us from the inside out.  Sin wreaks havoc on our facade of perfection, knocking off the pretty bows and sequins we use to make ourselves look pretty.  We walk into church on Sundays looking our best, but inside we are a total mess.   I come home from work, I assess the mess and begin trying to put things back where the...

A few mornings ago I decided to turn on the music instead of watching the news.  The news is always full of bad stories and I just wanted to worship.  I have an Amazon Fire box and so I sorted thru and found a channel with Christian music.  I was singing, packing my lunch, making breakfast and just worshiping the Lord as I readied for my day, when this song came on.  I've heard it many times but the cool thing about this app is it prints the words on the screen.  It came to the above verse and I just stopped in my tracks and tears started falling down my face. You see, I've been in some storms this past year.  My heart has been downcast and I've wondered where God has been in it all.  I have wondered if he loves me as I've been told He does.  Its easy to wonder when you feel completely surrounded by a storm and you can't feel his presence.  The words of this song reminded me I need to take my eyes off of the storm and place them...

I had a very vivid dream last night.  My grandparents on my moms side are both passed away.  In my dream they walked into my office while I was working.  At the moment I was surprised but not too stunned to see them.  They came to visit.  As I tried to get away to spend time with them it seemed the busier I got.  I was anxious to leave, but people kept coming in and wanting help and asking me questions - they were distracting me from being with the 2 people I most wanted to be with. As I was finally able to leave, they walked ahead of me out the door, across the street, into a crowd.  I tried to keep up.  Its as if they knew where they were going and they trusted I would follow.  I turned a corned and end they were gone. I panicked.  I asked a lady if she had seen them.       "They are old and I can't find them!  They were just here!"  I ran around frantically trying to locate them, but I couldn't.  T...

Fall. Its a beautiful time of year. Leaves start changing color.  The winds blow in cool and crisp.  The days are shorter and the nights are longer.  The animals are preparing for a long winter ahead by storing up food for the winter months. Fall is also the sign of an end.  The end of summer and long hot days.  The end of all things living and green.  Its a sign that its time for some things to die and slip into hibernation in order to prepare for the new life that will begin again in the spring. Our faith can be very much like fall.  We have sailed through a bright and sunny season in our lives when the winds of change roll in.  The breeze picks up and the winds of change start to howl and the leaves of our dying faith start to fall.  We've had a fun and easy time and we haven't built up our faith.  We haven't had to exercise it because life has been good.  What do we do when the storms of life roll in?  How ...

A few years ago I felt God stirring in my heart to "tell my story".  You see, I grew up in a small town in Northern Indiana, a child of divorce in a church that some would now consider a "cult".   I've had many experiences through life because of my upbringing and God has shown himself in many ways.  So, in my calling, I assumed I was to write a book.   I've never written a book.  I've never really written much, except my journals.  So, with good intentions of my heart, I sat down and tried to write a book.  Didn't happen.  I didn't know where to start, what to do, what direction to take it.  I've struggled now for a few years thinking I'm supposed to write a book and nothing has happened.  Well, life has happened.   I'm a single mom.  In these years I've raised 2 boys, taken care of a home, been the sole income earner in my home and had to deal with all the issues most women have a husband to help with. S...

Whats on my mind?    Well, its been in MY plans to sell my house and move...we are often told "If you want to change your life, its up to you...", or something along those lines. But, its isn't up to me. God orders our steps and what I WANT and what He wants for me may be 2 totally different things. I had my house up for sale for a year...yes, 12 whole months. And not one offer. Showings yes, but there was always something they didn't like. I love my house. I just don't love the location of this city. I don't love my job, I don't love being here without family close by....why then is God keeping me here? Its not for me to question Him. What I need to do is TRUST Him. I TRUST that God has a perfect plan for my life. I TRUST that He has greater things in store for me than my mind can conceive. What I thought would be good for me may not be. I'm still going to try to sell my house - its too much for me to maintain whi...

Matthew West has a song on the radio called "Mended". I've listened to that song multiple times...then one day I LISTENED to the words. Then I wrote the words down in my journal.  I realized that the song is sang from God's perspective.  It was HIM singing to me about what I see versus what He sees. How many times have we sinned and then thought God couldn't possibly love us anymore? How many times has bad things happened in your life and you wonder if God is even there? How many times have you thought NOTHING good can come of this? We all go thru hard times in life.  Sometimes those trials are short but sometimes they can go on for months or years.  In the midst of them we can't see the good that can come from them, the way our lives and our hearts are being changed.  We only see how broken we feel.  But, as the picture above depicts, God holds our broken hearts in His hand and begins the process of repair as we begin to seek Him. Parent los...

Hope...the confident expectation in the unseen future or the happy expectation of good. Do I have hope?  Do you?  Be honest...I will. What do I hope for? Hope for a better day... Hope for a better job... Hope for a Godly relationship... Hope for financial freedom... Hope for  a healthier, fitter body... Hope for restored relationships with loved ones... Hope that my family will all come to know Jesus... What do you hope for?  Do you think you can obtain all of those things on your own or do you trust in the one who can provide all your needs? Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope." God already knows what the outcome will be for all the things you HOPE for.  He can see the WHOLE picture...but he only gives us just enough to light our next step.  Why?  Because if we saw it all, the good and the bad, it would cripple us!!...

I woke up this morning before my alarm with a song in my heart...a prayer.  As I sat down to begin my bible study I was overwhelmed by God's presence.  So overwhelmed that I sat with eyes closed and began to silently cry.  I kept my eyes closed because I could see Him.   Years ago I had a dream.  A very vivid dream.  I was laying in a room, dressed in white.  In the corner of the room was Jesus.  He was patiently sitting there, waiting.  I remember asking him to just wait, because I wanted to see my brother first.  Jesus was waiting for me to come home.  (I still get emotional writing this).  I remember after a time my brother Mike appeared, knelt beside me and told me it was ok.  He loved me.  And then I was curled up in my Saviors lap, like a little girl.  He was patient and let me see my my brother before he ushered me into his arms.  I sit here with tears streaming down my face.  I will ...

Looks like a rock doesn't it?  When you first see it you may not think it holds any value.  To the untrained eye, the worth of this stone is not very high... BUT, to the trained eye, to the curator of fine things, this stone is precious and valuable. Many of us live our lives thinking we aren't worth much. We don't have the best body... We don't have the best car... We don't have the biggest house... We failed in our marriage.... We failed at parenting and our kids are on a difficult path... We aren't valuable or worthy. BUT, to the creator of beautiful things, we are worth so much more than we imagine. This is a rare blue diamond.  Uncut.  Unrefined.  Jagged edges.  Dirty.  But through the process of refinement it will become something highly treasured and valuable in others eyes. We are like Diamonds.  There is a song out on the radio called "Diamonds" by Hawk Nelson.  Every time I hear it, it brings tears to ...

Life is rough.  Sometimes we don't know if we are coming or going.  We don't know if we are to stay or to move.  Do we pray without ceasing or are we to Be still and know He is God? That is my conundrum for today. I was out walking this morning - yes it was wet out, little foggy and misty, but I won't melt I promise!  I've found lately that I just am not connecting during my time with the Lord.  I don't have any direction - I feel like I'm a flag flapping in the wind, tossed to an fro.  Walking the last few mornings has helped me to at least talk to God.  If I stay in the house I all of a sudden develop ADHD....I can't focus on any one thing for 2 seconds! So Gods word tells us to pray without ceasing.  That doesn't mean we need to be on our knees, prostrate before the Lord.  But, to continually be in conversation with him throughout our day.   But we are also told to be still and know he is god.  These two verses...

Jesus loves me This I know For the Bible tells me so.... We've all heard and even sang this song.  We learned it as small children and it brings back memories when we hear it as adults.  Recently I heard a sermon about His love for me.  The problem is - I've never believed it! Yes, you heard me right.  I  never believed Jesus loves me.  I grew up in a church that taught me to FEAR God.  If I didn't do things just right I would be punished.  God would withhold my blessings. If I had struggles in life it was because I didn't have enough faith or I had sin in my life that needed to be found out.   I FEARED Jesus.  To be honest, I've lived my life in fear.  Fear that if I sin, he will keep my blessings from me. Fear that if I sin, he will punish me. Certain that my life feels like I'm on a merry go round because of some hidden sin that I haven't confessed. So, when I was told a few weeks ago that Jesus loves me...

We long for the day to become parents - and then we do. We long for the day the baby walks - and then they do. We long for the day they talk - and then they do!!   We long for the day they start school - and then they do. We long for the day they can drive - and then they do. We long for the day they graduate - and then they do. We send them off to college to grow up - and then they do. But along the way, we are constantly teaching them.  We are instructing them as they grow.  We tell them No, Good job, this way not that way.  We soothe their hurts when someone is mean to them at school.  We applaud them when they do a good deed.  We are there for their highs and there for their lows...We teach them respect.  What it means to respect us, their teachers, other people.  Treat others like you would like to be treated.   You never know what someone is going through to make them act the way they do so treat them with ...